Sunday, December 6, 2009

'Twas a Few Weeks Before Christmas...

'Twas a few weeks before Christmas, and all through Northrend,
The players were waiting for 3.3 to begin.
Arthas was waiting, high in his cold castle,
Preparing things to cause adventurers hassle.

His lieutenants were waiting, his guards were ready,
Against the Ashen Verdict they'd be holding steady.
Tirion and Darion were marshaling their troops
When a small voice high in the citadel called "Oops!"

"My lord and master, I hate to remind you,
But you still need to write a villainous speech to
Strike fear into the hearts of those who attack
And send them running with our swords at their back."

Arthas frowned in thought, and with inspiration stood
"How about 'None may challenge the Brotherhood?"
Blood-Queen Lana'thel sighed and shook her head.
"I'm afraid, dear Lich King, that one's already been said."

"Now for you, insects! Boldly you sought the power..."
Arthas shook his head and thought for an hour.
"You face not Arthas alone, but the legions I command?"
Sindragosa stepped up. "Perhaps you don't understand.

"Sir, your speech must be original and unique to you.
Not something in the past lesser villains have used."
The Lich King glared and stomped from his room.
"Just wait, I'll think of something full of evil and doom!"

As Arthas chugged egg nog, feeling sad for himself,
Professor Putricide stepped up to the shelf.
"Have you thought, perhaps, instead of darkness and evil,
Making your speech about something more seasonal?"

The Lich King thought and thought, and gave a great sigh,
And there might have been a tear that escaped from his eye.
"I love Winter Veil, with all the colorsh and ice,
And presents and songs and shnowballs are nice.

"But I'm the evil they try to shweep under the rug.
And bad guysh don't get cookies and a kiss and a hug."
Putricide shouted back as he left with a grin,
"If you want that to change, you know how to begin."

Arthas made up his mind, and got really busy,
Making presents and costumes and a sled in a tizzy.
He called up his men, and said "Here'sh the plan!
We're going to shpread winter cheer throughout the land."

"Sho put on the hats, you can pick one of red or of green,
And get ready to have the best Winter Veil you've sheen.
With frostwyrms in front, and a flying shleigh behind,
We'll give a try to being cheerful and kind."

Though scared and uneasy, his Scourge forces agreed.
And they loaded the sled with things they might need.
The gifts were included, some chocolate in cups,
A few blankets tossed in for the kittens and pups.

"The children of Azeroth will get presentsh in bulk,
And in the name of all evil, Marwyn, enough with the shulk.
We're doing this my way, even if you aren't happy.
Now get in the damn sleigh and better make it shnappy."

With more egg nog in reach, and reins in his hand,
A fairly drunk Arthas flew over the land.
Leaning over the edge and shouting, he shared
"For thish year's Winter'sh Veil, you are not prepared!"

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